Have you ever fired a personal trainer? I have!

I was a few months into studying for my personal training certification.  A couple weeks out of physical therapy for a partially torn bicep tendon (4th time for this injury).  More importantly,

I was 9 months into my eating disorder (ED) recovery.

We'll circle back how my ED recovery ties in soon. But first…

I started studying for the CPT (certified personal trainer) certification in the Fall of 2018.  I was midway through the self study program when I realized I needed to figure out if I wanted to work at a gym, or go in another direction.  I needed to do some research.

If you're here you may have already realized, I went in another direction.

After looking into the gyms around me, factoring in drive-time and distance, my schedule with the kids, and at the time my work schedule, I decided on a big box gym that some friends worked with teaching group fitness classes.  Upon joining, all new members received a free assessment with the Training Manager (this will be important later).   Cool, let's see if what I was learning was put into practice.  We did an overhead squat assessment and he missed a couple big limitations that I had at the time (right ankle and right shoulder).  Then he wanted to take my weight and measurements. I said "no." Went on to explain my history with dieting eating disorders, over exercising, body image issues, and orthorexia.  I wasn't there to change the shape of my body.  I was joining the gym to get strong.  I shared my injury history, at the time I was just coming out of physical therapy for the 3rd time for my bicep/shoulder injury.  And he still tried to talk me into weighing myself, "but how will you know if you are progressing."

HEALTH AND FITNESS ARE NOT TIED TO WEIGHT LOSS.  PERIOD.

This is a social construct of a culture that is rooted in patriarchy, white supremacy, and racism.  I will be doing an entire series on this in the coming months.

He finally stopped trying to get me to consent to taking measurements and asked what my goals were:

• Learn how to barbell deadlift and squat - get strong AF.

• Improve my balance and core stability.

• Keep building my shoulder strength following physical therapy so I could perform ONE push-up from the floor.

"Don't you want to lose weight?"

I swear he was like a toddler that doesn't stop asking "why?"

Needless to say, I wasn't really a fan of this guy.  I left being set up with a trainer who I would see 2x a week for 30 minutes, because I did want some level of accountability and structure. For those of you who have never signed up or bought personal training packages at a big box gym, you will rarely work with the trainer who does your assessment.  

My first session with the trainer I was assigned to (I don't remember his name) was supposed to be 60 minutes.  We were supposed to sit down and talk, give him a chance to get to know my goals and needs before heading to the gym floor. Strike 1. That didn't happen.  Within the first 5 minutes, he asked me to weigh myself and I said no.  There were no questions about my training history or current limitations. He only focus seemed to be my weight and was annoyed I wouldn't step on the scale. Strike 2. Go back to the beginning, remember my torn bicep tendon. This plays a roll in the firing, but wasn't the final straw. 

The VERY FIRST EXERCISE he has me do? Battle ropes.  If you have never worked with battle ropes before they are not the best piece of equipment to start out with, especially if someone has shoulder issues.  Within 10 seconds, I felt a shooting pain down my arm.  It was like an electric shock.  Dropped the ropes and said "fuck no, not doing that."  Reluctantly, he moved onto something else.

Him:  "I see you want a six-pack, strong abs.  Let's do some Roman Chair leg lifts."

Me:  "Um, no that is not what I told Billy Bob (I don't remember the training managers name) I said I want to improve my balance and stability so I could lift a barbell safely.  I don't care about a six-pack."

Him:  "Well let's still to the leg lifts, it's a great core exercise."

I wanted to correct him, but at that point I was checked out and really just wanted to to get session over with.  Fun fact! Roman chair leg lifts are not the best ab exercise, your six-pack ab muscles do not cross your hip joint.  Are you using them to stabilize and hold yourself up? Sure, you work your core muscles isometrically  The muscles that are doing the “work,” the ones you feel in your lower abs? Meet your psoas.

Anyways, I attempted them.  If it wasn't for the shooting pain in my arm trying to hold myself up, probably could've done them.  I stopped after 2 reps, got down and said no to him again and asked to move on. And just like with me refusing to step on the scale, he was annoyed. There was no concern for my arm, just annoyance that he had to adjust what he had planned in his head. 

Even after all that had happened up until that point I was willing to give the guy a chance until, while I was doing mountain climbers he said...

"Time to burn off those Christmas cookies!"

I stood up, looked him straight in the eye and told him to "fuck off, I am done."  Walked away, went straight to the training manager and demanded a new trainer.  I WENT OFF.  And didn't and don't feel bad about it one bit.  I explained to both of these people my limitations with my shoulder, which should've been easy enough to work around IF then trainer was client-centered.  

But the biggest and most important issue to me was the fact that I shared my eating disorder history, my unhealthy relationship with food and exercise together, explained that weighing and measuring myself was triggering and it wasn't acknowledged.  It was brushed off and ignored.  My experience wasn't important, I wasn't important.  What was?  The trainers idea of what my goals should be, his idea of how I should eat, that weight lost and aesthetics should be the top priority.

So, I fired him. I got up from the floor and walked out, straight to the gym managers office and demanded a new trainer. Spoiler! She wasn’t much better.  After that experience I resolved to NEVER work in a big box gym, to always put needs of the amazing individuals I would work with at the center of coaching, and absolutely without a focus on weight loss or the size and shape of their bodies.  

Instead we focus on how amazingly strong and capable our bodies are no matter our size and shape.  We meet ourselves where we are at.  We focus on simple and sustainable actions in order to to build consistent health building habits that fit into our daily lives - for years to come.